|Age:||5000 (at time of death)|
- "Right as rain, I suppose. Might as fackin' well travel in a big group, I'm sure we won't attract any fackin' attention at all what with a fackin' WAR GOING ON! Fackin' fools."
- —Kusobaba d'Arioc to the Grand Alliance
Kusobaba d'Arioc was an elderly lefein woman who was accompanied by her pet cat Ralgha. She travelled with the Grand Alliance during the Arawn Losstarot War. She often used her infamous frying pan to thwack any person who annoyed her in the head, particularly a pirate named Bashkar. The only person she showed some respect to was a fellow lefein engineer named Daventhalas de Mont Hault although she did her best to keep her being a Lefein a secret from him.
She later befriended and married Artagel d'Arioc with whom she had a son whose line would eventually lead to the birth of Hageoyaji d'Arioc in the Third Age. The rest is, as the charming Lefein crone would say, "none of your fackin' business".
Despite her insistence to remain unknown, some of Kusobaba's adventures with Artagel were recorded, and the Remonian playwright William Veer later used these records as a basis for his harsh sexual comedy play The Taming of the Frying Pan.
Aliases and Nicknames
- Batty Old Hag
- What she was sometimes called.
- "The woman was old. Tyner had been prepared for old, as the townspeople had warned him, but they failed to get across how very old she really was. She looked like she'd changed the Creator's diapers sixteen thousand years before the world even existed. Her eyes were like night-black marbles sunken halfway into the depths of Hell, and her face made a prune that had been soaking in the bathtub for hours look like a baby's arse. In fact, the term "arse" would figure into practically any description of the woman's face."
- —Description of Kusobaba's looks
Kusobaba looked old. Really old, so much so that there was no adequate description for how old she actually looked despite people doing their damnest to capture at least a fraction of the lefein crone's "grace" when describing her.
Personality and Traits
- "Fackin' kid probably thinks she's hot shit, eh? Well, she don't know as much as old Kusobaba knows. Nobody knows as much as Kusobaba knows!"
Loud-mouthed, vulgar, snarky know-it-all. She was too old to care about proper etiquette and spoke her mind no matter if she was in the presence of kings, archmages or peasants. She also had common sense and often loudly questioned the Alliance's blunders, snidely reminding them that perhaps they should've prepared more adequately to face the dangers ahead instead of running straight into danger instead.
Powers and Abilities
An exceptionally good alchemist who also knew quite a bit about healing. She could practically brew any potion to treat almost any ailment possible as long as she got ingredients for the potion in question. Despite looking ancient, she was as agile as a 16-year-old girl and often surprised enemies with a skilled thwack or a dozen using her trusty frying pan.
Although Kusobaba saw Artagel as a nuisance at first, her treating him and later travelling with him warmed her heart towards the Scun midget. As the war raged on, love between the two eventually blossomed and would lead to Kusobaba getting pregnant and leading to a long line of the Arioc family that would extend centuries into the Third Age.
Daventhalas de Mont Hault
Kusobaba recognized Daven as a fellow lefein but wished to keep her lefeinish identity a secret from him. Daven ended up being one of the few people Kusobaba tolerated, and her odd behaviour around him did make Daven ponder why the crone seemed so different from others in the party.
Kusobaba and Ralgha argued often, and she had to assert her dominance over the cat on multiple occasions. Despite these thorny confrontations, the two did like each other whenever they managed to calm down enough, and Kusobaba often talked with Ralgha when there was no one else around to interact with.